How You See Yourself Has Everything To Do With Your Success

Sarah and I met to discuss her visibility goals. She had a big career plan that she wanted to achieve and that meant finding ways to get in front of her leadership. We went through the process and created a detailed plan for her to follow. She had everything that she needed to execute the plan and we set a date for a follow-up session a few weeks later. 

She called me for her session and I could tell by the tone of her voice that something was wrong. When I pressed her for more details, she shared her frustrations with me. She said, “I am taking these actions on the plan, but nothing is changing. No one is treating me differently at all. Maybe this isn’t going to work for me.” Change takes time and requires consistency. Self-doubt can show up at the start and clients need support to keep them from reverting back to previous behaviors.

I asked Sarah how she wanted others to see her? She began to describe in detail how she wanted others to see her, but then she suddenly stopped talking and looked at me. She smiled and said, “I can see what isn’t working now. I haven’t changed the way that I see myself yet, so how can others see me in a new way? Even though I am trying some of these new things, I am still doing what I did before and hiding in the background. I am not fully committing to this new version of myself. If I want others to see me the way that I just described, I have to take every opportunity to stand out and be bolder.”

This is the moment where the transformation occurred for Sarah.

She wasn’t ready to make that shift yet when we built the plan, she needed to experiment first. She took the bold approach to heart and began to look for opportunities to do more instead of hoping that someone might give her that chance. She created intentional ways to stand out in meetings by asking questions and contributing in a bigger way. Sarah learned that it wasn’t boasting when she shared wins with the right people. She had simply shared information positioned in such a way that they could see her value.   

Teaching leaders how to take action and be visible is only part of what has to happen. 

These changes take time and there is an internal mindset shift that needs to take place. As they experiment and experience that shift, it helps them build confidence. They start to act differently and believe that they can be the leader that they want to be. This is what helps them achieve the goals and success that they want in their career. 

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