What do you do when it is time to have the tough conversation? There are two common approaches to use. The direct approach will bring both parties together to get everything out on the table and address the situation head on. The second approach is to put off the conversation for as long as possible. Avoidance may seem like the easier route when you don’t want to have the tough conversation, but it is just putting off the inevitable. This procrastination just makes it that much harder to have the tough conversation later.
There are many situations where this happens to people both personally and professionally. Some common examples are when friends don’t want to say something that may hurt the other’s feelings or a manager doesn’t want to give tough feedback to an employee. Is the avoidance coming from a place of fear of how the other person will respond or are there other reasons? What if you have already tried to address it and things got heated? Do both sides just need some time to cool off before addressing the situation more calmly?
If you are finding that avoidance is your go to strategy, then it may be time to do some reflection. Avoidance creates awkwardness and resentment because things don’t get resolved. For some people this creates a pattern of just moving on and never addressing the real issue. Think about why you may be avoiding the conversation that you need to have. What is your fear about? What if you admit that this is difficult for you to say, but you want to be transparent with the other person? Be empathetic and put yourself in their position as you prepare for the conversation. Having these difficult conversations is where your growth will occur.